Part two: Where do we go from here?

This is the second part of the "Not your Grandaddy's Church" post.
In that last blog post, I presented the biggest problem the church has in the 21st century, generational growth. Church is becoming irrelevant to those under the age of 25. The problem rest's squarely on two group's shoulders. Parents and Church leaders.
I have been involved in youth ministry since I was 18 years old, which at 36 is now half of my life. Since I actually was a teenager for part of those first 18 years, it has been more like 2/3 of my life. Throughout those years I have taught a triangular ministry philosophy. The three points on the triangle are; the teen, the teen's parent(s), and the church leader in charge of the teen's spiritual growth while they are in that church's care. Here is how I break down each of the 3 responsible parties roles:
1) The teen: They must be willing to attend group meetings and be available to learn with a positive attitude and a willing heart to hear what God is saying to them through what is being said and done at the church meetings and events. They also need to commit to prayer, Scripture reading and fellowship with believers. These disciplines help the teen grow into a person who views the world from a Christian worldview, and lives their lives as a devoted Christ follower.

2) The parent(s): many families these days are single parent homes. That makes it much more difficult for the single parent to raise children in the ways of the Lord, as it is done best as a team, mother and father. However, the reality for many is a single parent home. Single parents are not off the hook for raising their children to be moral citizens, and thus are not off the hook for raising them as spiritual people. It just makes their job more difficult. They need to rely more on their church family to help fill in the holes where possible that were left by the absence of the teen's other parent. PARENTS MUST VALUE SPIRITUAL EDUCATION! The parent's role is to be the primary leader in spiritual things for each teen. If they are not, it makes things much more difficult for the teen to grasp the need for Christ's guidance and leadership in their life. The parent is also responsible for bringing their children to church and other spiritual events. Not just bringing them but supporting those in church leadership. Also not just bringing them but making it a priority amongst the busy schedules teenagers keep. If the parent's allow other things like sports, vacations, chill time, family events, and school to be more important then the relationship their teen has with God, then this is where a big problem exists. If a parent schedules swim lessons on Sunday mornings, when church is going on, how is that helping the spiritual growth of their teenage child? If the family reunion is scheduled for Sunday morning, how does that benefit the teen's spiritual growth? Parent's are accountable for the teen's schedule and also for their own schedule and priorities. Teens are watching their parents, so make sure if you are a parent that you are not being hypocritical.

3) Church leadership: The job of the church is to provide spiritual teaching and mentoring to both the parent's and teens in their group or congregation. Providing a safe and loving environment is also important, a place where the teen feels like they belong. Church leadership also holds the teen's and parent's accountable for choices that are made, both good and bad, and are committed to the family through all obstacles. The area where church leadership most frequently fails is in mentoring parents on the importance of their role as spiritual leaders to their children. Church leaders do not get enough time to turn children and youth from ignorant-about-God sinner's to God loving Christ followers when they only see them for a few hours a week. The parent's have the most impact on the spiritual development of their children. That is why church leader's need to pour more time then they historically have into the parent's and less into pizza and video games. We are close to losing the next generation. We need to fight for them! We need to up our efforts! Much of the loss is due, not to disinterest from teen's but from poor priorities for parent's. Church leaders need to think beyond the box on ways to relate to teens, and to make church relevant again, or it also will be tough to sustain any growth. Parent's can force their teens to church, but if it is boring and irrelevant, the teen will exit stage left whenever the first opportunity arises. So the onus is on parents and leaders! Step it up!